“ 3 Anchors to Keep Us Grounded During Turmoil”

How to stay grounded during politically induced stress

I have a confession to make: I am a mental health professional who has been deeply affected by politically induced stress. Why? My DMV practice supports immigrants, humanitarians, diverse professionals, federal employees, lawyers, politicians, and business owners. I have found myself right in the middle of the storm! First, it was the dismantling of humanitarian organizations, the recanting of civil and immigration rights, and the firing of federal workers. Now, affective polarization, political antagonism, loss of trust in government institutions, political violence, and international humanitarian crises are the order of the day. I get up many mornings feeling disoriented, shocked, angry, sad, and grieving. It has been a challenging season, and I am thankful for my therapist and the mindful practices I have given myself to over the years! Similar to my experience, you may feel overwhelmed when trying to process current events and unplanned changes. I offer no quick or easy solutions, yet there are some anchors we can rely on when the world as we know it is falling apart. Let me share with you:

1- Embrace Community

Any thriving or healing we achieve is promoted by the people we share life with.

According to neuroscientist Daniel Siegel, our brain fosters new connections and works better and faster if (well-intentioned) human beings surround us. I have a friend who recently lost a loved one. She was sad yet told me it was special to witness her child being exposed to her large family while they grieved. She mentioned that many cried, laughed at each other's jokes, sat silently, cried some more, and then laughed together again. Safe people offer us permission just to be, and it is one of the greatest gifts when we feel discombobulated by life. Find your safe people at work or home and experience how their presence anchors you! Now, a practice I keep coming back to, which is really hard: guard your heart against intense dislike and vicious animosity towards others with different political leanings. According to neuroscience's research on mirror neurons, cultivating deep hatred towards others activates similar feelings within us, negatively impacting our well-being and overall quality of life. It is like the adage of drinking poison while waiting for other people to die. Dislike perspectives, not the people.

2- Embrace Every Emotion You Feel.

It is easy celebrating happy emotions and sending sadness and grief into exile. Challenging emotions are complex and require extra time and energy. Perhaps due to our professions and life obligations, we have little space to express or process negative feelings. We end up becoming our own executioner. We "kill" the "bad" emotions but end up destroying the good ones along with them! Yet, generosity towards ourselves and all emotions opens paths of flow and possibilities within. Embracing all emotions is our path to thriving! Contrary to being a bad thing, our sadness and grief are instruments of transition that allow our entire selves to metabolize all the unexpected changes and hardships we are experiencing.

I love watching K-dramas! The reason is that cultures embrace emotions differently. I am often fascinated by the open display of sadness and grief. When we give ourselves time to process challenging emotions, we experience relief and a clearer perspective.

I have witnessed firsthand how much freedom clients experience when they overcome their fear of their perceived negative emotions and treat them as friends who come to deliver necessary messages from their inner worlds, including the essential messages they have been scared to listen to. Allow self-understanding to anchor you even when it hurts. Contrary to popular belief, addressing our emotional pain is quite productive. It conserves a significant amount of energy that we would spend otherwise feeling depressed or anxious.

3- Embrace “Life as is”.

Along with accepting all life's feelings comes accepting life's present situations. We struggle many times because we equate accepting with agreeing. I did not agree to having an ongoing health challenge, yet my world became better when I accepted its reality. Embracing "life as is" means accepting to live life in the "and" by developing the emotional range to face and accept all life's situations, including the unexplainable and unwanted challenging seasons. Acceptance puts us in control to adapt and make the necessary changes rather than using all our energy to fight what we cannot change. Embrace consciousness. Please do not try to edit out life's distressing situations or merge with sorrow as if it is all there is to your existence. There is so much happening that our thriving relies on preparing for the long run. For this reason, it is OK to laugh & cry, rage & sing, sob & dance, to live each emotion as they emerge without judgment. We solve the problems we can and accept those we cannot. The mystery lies in embracing life's beauty and turmoil as they come. 

Because too many changes are happening simultaneously, it will take a while for us to experience feelings of certainty and safety again. We cannot put life on hold until all injustices, sorrows, and turmoil cease.

Recognize that even in our sorrow, we are still here and alive. Despite the pain, be intentional about creating spaces for laughter, connection & joy in your life. Commit to consciousness, kindness, and connection.

This blog is my way to keep sanity and amplify light when the world is turning upside down. I hope it helps. I hope you find what keeps you sane. I am sending thoughts of courage, awareness, joy, beauty, faith, and love your way despite the challenges you are currently facing. Try your best to hold on to your anchors when turmoil comes. I am doing the same.